The end is near....

A lot has happened since the last time I blogged. Finals happened. Didn't do as well as I should've, but I passed. Last quarter was hard for me. Being away from my nina, worrying about her, not knowing what was going to happen next. I wanted to be there this summer to spend time with her, I feel this is the last summer I'll have with her. I am in Reno. My cousin needs my help. She doesn't really have anyone up here who can help her. I really don't mind. I would rather be where I am needed most then to be where i want to be.

My Nina isn't doing to well. She was in the hospital a few weeks ago with an open sore which ended up being a wound. She had a fungal infection in her tummy. She's out of the hospital now. She's not doing chemo anymore. She went in on Friday for chemo and they told her there wasn't much they can do for her. They gave her a shot to make her comfortable. I feel soon she will pass but I know she won't be suffering anymore and on that day I will be happy for that.

We went down to Fresno. I am most worried about my cousin. I know my aunt is at terms with whats happening to her but my cousins I am most worried about. They are going through this again. I wish I could be there with my little cousin. I know she needs me. She's hurting, though I know me being there with her this weekend helped her out a lot.

We started talking and it really reminded me of how i felt when my grandma was going through this. I still think about. I have been missing my Nino lately, my cousin has been thinking and missing him too. We talked about him and I pretty much told her about my grandma. We connected and she understood that I understood how she was feeling.

I know with time she'll be ok. Part of me is hoping she'll call me tell me she needs me there with her. I will be there in a heartbeat as soon as I can just for her. She means the world to me. Not just her but her dad (my cousin who I call big brother), her sister and her step mom. My aunts and my cousins in Reno as well. I can only hope and wish the best for all of us right now.

Let the "Fight" begin!

So as you know, my cousin’s are all having babies. I am so excited for them! However, it seems the “fight” for me has begun. My cousin left this comment on my facebook and Jeff (Felicia’s husband made a comment)to which I responded:

Jay: So I did the numbers and figured out that if you moved back to Fresno, you would make more money from babysitting the new cousins and tutoring Alex than you would as a nursing school graduate! Just some food for thought...

Jeff: if she comes and babysits mine she can go to nursing school and get paid :)
Me: I know! whoever pays for my nursing school that's where I'll go! Hehe

So I responded this way to Jay and look at what everyone said!

Me: you'll have to show me these numbers
Nacho Cheese: Good answer
Jay: I'm your cousin! Would I lie to you?!? :)
Felicia: Well if u came to Reno for the summer babysat for kats and became a cocktail waitress at night u be rolling in dough that u have enough money for the year working 3 months and can go back to school with money in your pockets!!
Nacho Cheese: Fresno,fresno,fresno
Me: you have me for the summer felicia...but i won't be a cocktail waitress haha
Felicia: Damn and I thought I beable to go to the casino and get free beer ohhh I forgot free Shirley temples!!
Jay: You mean you don't want to spend summer in Fresno?!? We have everything from Valley Fever to Beiber Fever!
Chicken: Reno, Reno, Reno! Mom and aunt knows best!
Felicia: I don't know about fresno and this so called beaver fever is but I want to stay away from that sounds too sticky and could get u in alot of trouble!!
Jay: Lol. Not beaver fever...Beiber fever!
Nacho Cheese: Please guys the children remember? Bad language must cease
Vanessa: I agree with Jay Fresno is the best place for you lol j/k whatever you choose is a good choice i guess :/ lol :)
Me: oh my gosh you guys are all amazing! i love ya!
jay ewwww bieber gross! and here i thought you wanted me there lol


I’m excited to see what happens…wonder who will step up to pay for my schooling? Haha I love my family and I wish I could be in 3 places at once. A teleportation device needs to be made before these babies are born! Quick someone get on that!

Babies!!!!

I thought that before I start dinner I should write. I haven't written in awhile and there is so much that has been going on! My aunt is doing better after she got the blood transfusion. She sounds so much better when I talked to her on the phone. She's doing good and I am glad she is doing so much better. My cousin, Felicia, in Reno is doing good. Although, there is a part of her foot that is still not healing. It is oozing out cool gross stuff. If it doesn't heal they are going to have to amputate further. I hope it heals.

Amidst bad news good news can only follow. Right? CORRECT! My aunts son, my cousin, Jay, who is like big brother to me, is having another child! It is a girl, her name is Abigail, and she is due in October! I am so excited for them. They have 2 girls already, Alexis and Ameila(Millie). (I wonder if they notice what they did.) Alexis is going into high school next year! I can't believe how grown up she is. In 4 years she will be in college! Ameilia is 5 years old and she is a handful! In a good way though. She's always so excited when I visit. I miss them so much!

Felicia is also expecting another child! She has a little girl who is 6! She starts first grade soon. She is due in November. She finds out soon what they baby is. I am so excited! I am hoping it is a boy. I want a baby boy in the family.

I found out a few minutes before I decided to write this blog that another of my cousin's, Nacho Cheese (we have the same birthday) is also expecting a child! That is three new additions to our family! I don't know much about their baby, but I will soon. He has a son already.

I am so excited about the new additions to our family! Babies make me smile! They are so cute! I don't have very many classes left to take. I have decided to take classes Fall quarter and take Winter quarter off. If I am needed in Fresno or Reno I will be spending that quarter there to help out. I love helping my family and taking care of their children. It makes me excited and somewhat prepared for when I have kids. I won't be having kids for awhile though. I have to be financially stable and be able to support myself before I can be able to support a family. I also need to me married first before I can have kids. Haha which reminds me of something Millie said to me once when my aunt was in the hospital. This is how our conversation went:

Millie- Tammy, did you know my mommy is pregnant?
Me- I did! I am excited for her.Do you want a baby brother or a baby sister?
Millie- I want a baby brother!
Me- I want you to have a baby brother too.
Millie- Tammy, are you pregnant?
Me- hahah What?! No! I'm not pregnant.
Millie- Oh, why not?
Me- Because I'm not married. I have to be married before I can have babies.
Millie- No you don't!
Me- Yes you have to be married before you have babies.
*Millie looks towards mommy*
Nichole (her mom)- Yes you have to be married before you have babies

She seemed satisfied with that. Like if her mommy says so then its right. Some time later, I was reading something or talking to her or something and she says:

Millie- You should get married.
Me- I can't get married I don't have a boyfriend
Millie*whispers in my ear*- You can marry Greg.
Me- No, I don't want to marry Greg. He's my friend.
Millie- Oh.

She seemed sad. It was cute. I miss her so much. She says the most adorable things. I feel like I missed Alex growing up, she is now going into high school! I know this is an exciting time for my whole family and I'm super happy and thankful to be a part of this. I know God has so many more plans for me and my family. He is blessing us with three new little ones.